Posts Tagged ‘ blow jobs ’

Acceptance

Last night my Owner claimed what’s His for His gratification; my body. In my head I understand that is basically my role in this dynamic but deep down I don’t like it.

I tend to invert into myself when He does this (Thank gosh He doesn’t do it often) until it’s over. I hide from the negative feelings that pop their ugly little heads up. Truth be told I’m also hiding from my Master. I have a very hard time wrapping my head around the fact that I am, complementary to my beliefs, a piece of His property. Although an important piece of property.

I enjoy talking about myself as such but when it comes down to the nitty-gritty… I don’t like the activities that make me that. Don’t get me wrong, I love being His slave, bitch and personal slut! I thrive when I am under His control and am more comfortable on the floor by His feet. As I write this I am sitting on the floor while He drives. I don’t mind doing the domestic duties (except making the bed!) because it centers me into my role as slave while it pleases Him.

I just can’t wrap my head around being sexually used as His personal cock sucker, cunt and piece of ass, even though that is a part of what I am. I can say the words and revel in my role when He says them. But the actions? Nuh-uh! I hide from them like a hypocrite.

Master told me, last night during the after-care, that I needed to accept my role as His property. Once I realized by accepting the fact that I not only pleased Him but also gave Him what He needed at the time, I fulfilled my role! He told me I shouldn’t hide from pleasing Him when He needs it most…

It makes sense and I want to be able to do exactly that. And I decided to let you in on the process! I want to succeed in pleasing my Master and molding myself to better please Him. There are a few areas that I need to work on. So, I’m creating a new category for this named Hurdles. In order to succeed I need to write about my thoughts and feelings during this road to a better me. If I ignore the feelings and problem areas I will fail. I know that about me, I have to analyze the situations and deal with them accordingly. And right now, where it counts, I can’t afford to fail!

Spontaneity

After all those Walmart blitz Master and I were about ready to kill one another! It just got so bad so quick. Looking back on it I’m not even sure why it got so bad. For my part I just got so sick of the close space and always going it was horrible. He just got so preoccupied with the job that I felt like I was being passed up for cash.. Which isn’t a good feeling to have by the way. Then it just escalated so far out of hand that Master and I had to sit down and talk it through because I was at my wits end..

So Tuesday night we hashed it out. I’m going to keep the details to my lonesome. (yall gotta just suffer!) Then Wednesday morning Master took us to the FunDome Hotel. A friend of His told us it was a nice place and it was! Their hot breakfast was surprisingly good and the fruit was fresh. The yogurt was even good. Plus the rooms were nice. The only bad thing about them was the shower was to small! I had a really bad panic attach. The only thing that kept me in the shower getting smooth was Masters words before I got in the darn thing. He ordered me to get as smooth as possible. And I did but after some time I just had to get out. Master helped calm me down once I got out and collapsed on the floor. Once dry I curled up in the bed for a while and all we did was watch tv while I calmed down. I am so greatful I have such an understanding Master. I don’t know what I would do with out Him!
After a while He asked me if I was hungry (meaning food) and I stretched out showing my nekkedness and looked longingly at His dick. Then He proceeded to lick my dripping cunt so expertly while I took His hard dick eagerly into my mouth! I took a while to orgasm but once the first one came the second one came right on its heels. I mean wow! Master finnished all over my breasts. That right there is why Master likes to be so spontaneous! You all are probably thinking that’s it?! Well… Yeah. It reconnected us on a very intimate level and right then that is what was needed, not a hard fuck or spanking. Some might not get how connected a Master and His property really are! Sometimes its not about the ouchies or being taken. Sometimes its about getting even more intuned with one another on a more spiritual level. I have been filled with more devotion towards Him then I have felt for a long time. And happier I could not be!!

Sometimes whips, chains and clamps aren’t what’s needed to bring two souls back on the same wave length..

Later when we stop I plan on showing my gratitude and devotion by a long relaxing backrub. 🙂

Good girl

Kneeling beside his favorite lounge chair the girl waits for his return. Her bare flesh starting to get goose bumps from the air conditioner being set a bit to cold. Her pink nipples standing to attention. Wringing her hands in the bindings that she put on in her lap nervously as the minutes tick by with out the door opening and without Him walking in. Her thoughts start to travel to forbidden places. What if someone comes while I’m like this? Did something happen to Him? A slick sheen creeps over her palms as the girl starts to panic. Her heart pounding, her head jerks up at the sound of keys in the front door. Her eyes squeeze shut as soon as she hears the distinct sound of his boots. She learned that lesson a long time ago. Butterflies ignite a war dance inside her belly causing her nerves to rocket out of control. A hand moves along her cheek in a soft caress trailing down her neck over her collar to the middle of her throat. The hand tightens ever so slightly as she sucks in a breath of air.

“What a nice way to be greeted when I first get home. Spread your legs.” He commands in an all business voice. The girls thighs part instantly revealing the pleasure his touch gives her. Her feminine petals are slick with need. With a firm grip on her collar he forces her to move before him. His thumb moves to play over her red painted lips, “Open.” Before she could suck in a breath from her now opened mouth she feels the hard head of his shaft thrust into her mouth. Around his cock she whimpers at the musky taste of the drop of pre-cum beading there. “Suck.” Instantly she sucks ravenously at his throbbing shaft barely able to contain her excitement of being allowed to taste him. She hardly ever gets the chance to suck his cock to completion and her hopes are astronomical for this encounter. His quick breathing a signal that she might just get her wish, her head bobbing along his shaft even faster. The head hitting the back of her throat causing her gag reflex to flare up. Spit dribbles from her mouth down his balls and falls on her open thigh. His hands dig into her auburn curls taking the control of her head and mouth movements not allowing her to move. He thrusts his hips wildly, fucking her mouth as his balls tighten and his heart races. Muscles clinch as his fingers dig painfully into her hair and scalp. An intoxicating squeal escapes her throat causing him to slip over the edge, pouring his essence in her mouth. “Don’t swallow!” Whimpering the girl has no choice but to obey. The taste of him soothing her nerves and causing her need and lust to rise. “Now you may swallow.” Her head goes back as his cum slides down her throat. She opens her mouth to show him she swallowed every last drop… “Good girl. You didn’t waste any.”