Posts Tagged ‘ fantasies ’

Dark Desires

I have so many images, dark fantasies or desires inside my head. I see how things would go if I had any control over situations and also what could of been. But I am not in control of such things He is…

After doing something wrong I picture him striping me down quickly, forcing me onto my knees while He chokes the life breath from my throat and lungs until both scream for a release of pressure. He steps on my back until my head is crammed into the ground with my bare butt in the air! Unable to move until He says to, unable to speak or look around. Forced to sit there thinking on what I did wrong while He is in complete control of Himself.. Anything among those lines fascinate me to no end. How I long for His firm grip once again putting pressure on my neck. Or when He takes great pains in positioning the clothes pins just so on/around my nipples to cause the maximum amount of pain possible. All the while His slowness kills me more then the pain itself… (in situations like this I have no patience what-so-ever!) Hell, even the feal of His hand/belt across my bare flesh while I am bent over the bed, exposed to him! But above anything else I desire bruises, marks and welts that last longer then a couple of days. I long for the dark purple almost black splotches to mark along my butt, breasts and inner thighs among many other places. I crave the mental fog/haze that would require to create such artful marks. The feeling of being completely at the mercy of another person. But not just any person, no; The one you love most. The Man that completes you and allows you to soar. Trusting Him to know when to be harsh and when to be kind. To know when to stop and to keep going. I desire more than anything to feel that not only does He have my body in His hands but in some cases my very life.

I crave to give Him everything I am ten times over in the throws of passion, pain, lust, sweat, tears and pleasure. I wish to fuel His unending control and Sadistic side with my submission and willing spirit, mental stability and giving body.

If only I could find a way to bring my wants, cravings and dark desires to life!

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Pup play

For the past week and a half I have had a severe need to do pup play. I don’t know why any of the activities of being a dog/puppy excite me. A part of me wants to deny it until I am blue in the face. But all you would have to do to know otherwise is mention putting my lying behind in a cage and I’m all a-quiver as Master puts it. There is just something about being made to crawl on all floors everywhere I go, having to scratch at the bathroom door to pee or even eating out of a dog dish that makes my heart start to race in anticipation. Maybe it’s the humiliation of it all that excites me. Because the worst thing ever is having to either pee outside or bark at the back door to let Master know that is exactly what I have to do. Those are two things that I am still unsure about. Their pretty extreme even for me.

The parts that excites me are sleeping in a cage, having a leash on, eating treats from Master’s hand and eating from the doggie bowl. For some even that is extreme but it excites me like nothing else. It is the forbidden aspect of being a puppy girl that sends lustful images of Master taking me from behind like the bitch that I am. I can’t explain it.

This last couple of weeks/month has been really hard on me. To the point that I need to feel nothing but my Master’s ownership. Exactly how much in control that He is. I need to be humiliated, lowered and put into my place to the max in order to let everything go. Basically I need to be whipped, gaged, and tied up. I need to be treated like a rag doll or bitch that is only here for my Master’s pleasure. I don’t need nice. I need harsh, extreme and humiliation. When I am stripped raw I am at my basic form. I am completely submissive and not able to think. Which is exactly what I need. When I am not thinking just feeling I am more in tune with my Master and HIS needs then anything else. It is the best way for me to center myself and get back to who I really am. Call it sub space or anything else you wish. I call it my Anna space.

I think tomorrow I will talk to Master about it. Tonight I know He just wants to relax and He has a phone call that He really doesn’t want to make then He will call His little girl. I know He has been looking forward to that all day, and if the first conversation ruins that I will be livid. She hasn’t seen anything yet if she takes that away from Him! *takes a deep breath* Plus We have been trying to get a good movie night in for a while now. And We have the munchies and time. So no time like the present right?

I have to help Master back up a 75 foot trailer without hitting anything.

*His slave/pup/bitch , Mas:)