Posts Tagged ‘ Home time ’

Normal vs Slave

From a vanilla stand point this weekend has been great. We got a lot accomplished. We paid the bill, got my I.D and did the laundry. Master even got His CDL renewed. I didn’t get my nails done but we watched 3 good movies. He doesn’t want me to get a manicure so I probably won’t be able to. Which really Stinks!!

We have a load going to Houston tomorrow. Our home time is over. Which bites big time. We had all this space at our disposal and never used it in a non-vanilla way. I’ve even mentioned water play. But all He wanted to do was watch TV and relax. I don’t know why I bother packing the clothes pins or candle. They are hardly if ever used. I’m actually afraid to get other toys. I don’t know if they will be used. I got a very small bad spanking that lasted five minutes.

So from a slave stand point this weekend blew. I had pictured something else when He said He had plans for this weekend. Something better, more intense since He won’t do anything in the truck. I doubt He realizes that. Heck, He might. I don’t want to hear Him complain about not having space then waste it when He has it. Nothing goes right! I cant remember the last scene that lasted longer than 45 minutes. I’m not sure how to ask with out rejection anymore. I would kneel and offer His belt but He wouldn’t take it and use it. Maybe next time we get a hotel… In a month or more 😦

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Spontaneity

After all those Walmart blitz Master and I were about ready to kill one another! It just got so bad so quick. Looking back on it I’m not even sure why it got so bad. For my part I just got so sick of the close space and always going it was horrible. He just got so preoccupied with the job that I felt like I was being passed up for cash.. Which isn’t a good feeling to have by the way. Then it just escalated so far out of hand that Master and I had to sit down and talk it through because I was at my wits end..

So Tuesday night we hashed it out. I’m going to keep the details to my lonesome. (yall gotta just suffer!) Then Wednesday morning Master took us to the FunDome Hotel. A friend of His told us it was a nice place and it was! Their hot breakfast was surprisingly good and the fruit was fresh. The yogurt was even good. Plus the rooms were nice. The only bad thing about them was the shower was to small! I had a really bad panic attach. The only thing that kept me in the shower getting smooth was Masters words before I got in the darn thing. He ordered me to get as smooth as possible. And I did but after some time I just had to get out. Master helped calm me down once I got out and collapsed on the floor. Once dry I curled up in the bed for a while and all we did was watch tv while I calmed down. I am so greatful I have such an understanding Master. I don’t know what I would do with out Him!
After a while He asked me if I was hungry (meaning food) and I stretched out showing my nekkedness and looked longingly at His dick. Then He proceeded to lick my dripping cunt so expertly while I took His hard dick eagerly into my mouth! I took a while to orgasm but once the first one came the second one came right on its heels. I mean wow! Master finnished all over my breasts. That right there is why Master likes to be so spontaneous! You all are probably thinking that’s it?! Well… Yeah. It reconnected us on a very intimate level and right then that is what was needed, not a hard fuck or spanking. Some might not get how connected a Master and His property really are! Sometimes its not about the ouchies or being taken. Sometimes its about getting even more intuned with one another on a more spiritual level. I have been filled with more devotion towards Him then I have felt for a long time. And happier I could not be!!

Sometimes whips, chains and clamps aren’t what’s needed to bring two souls back on the same wave length..

Later when we stop I plan on showing my gratitude and devotion by a long relaxing backrub. 🙂

Update

We got back from our home time yesterday. We were met with a lot of messages concerning loads. We are doing the walmart blitz until monday. A most boring run I couldn’t imagine! We go from Houston to dallas then back… That’s it. Easy money sure but I don’t know if its worth it. He is already snapping at me for “selective hearing”. I have to look at Him to hear over the drum of a diesel engine, so when I look away I can’t hear Him so well. Its a disaster if a car or animal snags my attention away from Him for a second!! As you can tell today and yesterday have sucked. I doubt its going to get any better.

Home time was… Productive. We got our po box and sent in the change of address form. Within two weeks the man said the mail would start going there, which is good. My mother now has no excuse for not sending in for my birth certificate. We also paid the remainder of the phone bill a day early as it turned out, so that is current and done with until december 3rd. We relaxed, he watched his wrestling and I played on the phone. I even got a spanking. It left very little marks. The ones that were there were spotty and faint. There already gone. I doubt I will get any bruises that are good. He stops way to early and doesn’t raise the intensity after I stop making noises. Its like he doesn’t know how to do it so I will bruise… If you ask him why I’m sure he will make up an excuse, he always does!

We have talked about raising the pain level many times. Yet he stops when the going gets good. Its like deep down he doesn’t want to leave marks. His sadistic side has died away, I wish he would get it back but he doesn’t seen to want to. I don’t get it nor do I pretend that I do with him. Its like my suggestions arnt sticking in my head even though its my limits he won’t test. Then you add to that the fact we haven’t had sex in a month, you start to see why I think were going back to the two weeks of control and domination only! Just like before… But he doesn’t or won’t see that.

Maybe he just needs some encouragement to do more pain full things. But how do I do that with out being to pushy or nagging? I ask him for more but he says his hand hurts (he prefers his hand to a weapon) and to give him a moment. When I do he doesn’t want to continue and I very much do! The spankings last 20+ minutes tops if I’m lucky and that’s all he does. I always have to ask for ouchies there never just given. Some people would say I’m greedy and should be thankful for what he does give me. And your all right. But what would you do if what you wanted wasn’t a guarantee? Would you sit by and let it slip through your fingers or would you fight to keep it?! I will always fight for what I want/need to be myself. And I know beyond a doubt it makes him feel like the king of the world after a long, rough scene! You can tell by the way he acts and talks. It makes for a more enjoyable day, for the both of us.

So why he won’t do it I don’t know…