Posts Tagged ‘ masturbation ’


As I wrote yesterday I had a spontaneous burst of erotic picture-taking. The whole experience was fun and kind of kinky. I was so heated I asked to play. His response “yep ya can.” Then “you can play now and later hehe.” I was uber excited. Two play times in 1 day? How did I get so lucky, right?


Remember its Ngt we are speaking of. The man who will say one thing and do the complete opposite. So earlier in the day I was told I would be tied and blind folded. I was again in a jittery state of anticipation.

I told Him the day before that just playing with a toy/finger is unfulfilling and leaves me empty or hollow. Plus I hadn’t cum in two months when He came the last week. When we came to the truck I got all but naked in my eagerness. Turns out it wasn’t needed.

All that was done was me giving Him a quick tug until He came. I don’t like doing that because my hand gets sticky and I don’t like the taste of His cum. I don’t like blow jobs or wads of semen.

So my new upper body harness wasn’t used. (I threw it out the next day) I didn’t get touched and I was never tied up or blind folded. So once again I feel degraded, used, empty, unfulfilled and disappointed. But whats new??

I’ve also realized something. I don’t have to bend over awkwardly to shave my cunt anymore. I will trim it because a full bush is nasty. But I’m the only one to see it, so why bother? It’s not like He uses it enough to notice!


Being Taken

… When we got back to the truck after the thunder storm it was really dark. He decided to change parking spots and go to the very back, dark corner of the yards lot. Right then I knew what ever he had planed wasn’t going to be at all pleasurable but instead extremely painful. Since I’m a screamer in all things painfull, and having no gag he has to park away from people as much as possible. And boy did I scream! At first he had me finger myself while stroking him. I really didn’t want to play with myself right then. Something came over me just at that moment and I was severely shy! I have never been shy sexually, I know what I want/like and will do whatever is needed to get it. But as soon as Master had me do that I was instantly turned off. That has NEVER happened with us. I’ve had a hard time orgasming but never being instantly turned off. I had to do what I was told though because he was in full Master mode as he puts it. At that point he made me get on all fours, continue to play all the while smacking
my butt, thighs and back with the combination of his belt and hand. I wasn’t given a safeword so all I could do was bare it and hope he would stop soon. Not only am I a screamer I’m also a mover. When it gets to painful I move away from him even though it will do me no good what-so-ever! I was in tears after five minutes or so and he was still going. I thought it would never end. At some point he got behind me and used my hole rather painfully because I was no longer wet. He had my hair in his hand and pulling my head up of the pillow. I am still sore! After such use and harshness I yearn for my cage. All I wanted was to be put away to ponder what happened and every thing I felt. But alas, the cage doesn’t fit in the truck. When that bitch threw us out we had to condense everything and I had to sacrifice my gag, blindfold, restraints and cage. We haven’t been able to get any of that back yet.

Are toys considered a necessity? After the text from angel all we are buying is the essintials so we can save money quicker.. We are going to have to get them at some point anyway. And find a place/way to hide them.

We will get to that road block when it shows up.